Todd and I are pregnant! Well we have been for 4 months. I decided I need to be better about blogging while I am pregnant because I really want to remember all of the wonderful things I have felt and experienced during pregnancy.
The weekend that I found out, I had a big sign that I was definitely pregnant because Todd and I got in a little argument before we went to Cafe Rio for dinner and out of no where I just lost it and started BALLING my eyes out, so much that I couldn't control it. I was literally crying harder than I had in a loooooong time. I felt so stupid that I ran into the bathroom and of course Todd felt horrible so we were both over what we were spatting about in about 2 seconds and he was there to help me out...but I realized there was something seriously wrong with my emotions. I had never felt so vulnerable and out of control of my own body - It was really weird. I actually told Todd I thought I might be pregnant but then dismissed it because I wasn't ready to get another "not pregnant" from that stupid little stick. So we went to dinner at Cafe Rio and ANOTHER sign that I was pregnant. Todd and I always share the salad there because it is ridiculously massive and we could never finish an entire meal there...so when I sat down to eat my half, I scarfed it down so fast and cleaned my plate completely, which I usually don't do either, I usually give the last few bites to Todd. I was so hungry and it tasted like heaven. I thought again, "Hmm, that was weird...maybe I'm pregnant?" But again, just dismissed it for a while until I could take a test.
I found out I was pregnant on February 5th, 2012. Todd and I started trying in December of 2011, we didn't get pregnant the first month so instead of being normal and saying "That is okay, next month..." I decided to be a crazy lady and make myself think it would never happen. I was so stressed out and worried that there might be something wrong with me that I am actually surprised I conceived a baby during that time. haha I waited longer than necessary to take a test because I was so sure it would just say negative and I would just throw it across the room but my sister took a test and hers was positive so she was dying to know what mine would say. I told Todd on Sunday night after we got home from my Mom and Dad's house that I would wait until that next Friday to take the test because I wanted to be SURE that I had missed my period. (Which by the way, I had been counting them wrong my whole life. haha Whoops.) But when I got home that night and Todd was using the computer. I just decided if I was pregnant, it would tell me and I just needed to know so bad. I took a test and I was totally shocked and surprised when I looked at it and it said "Pregnant." My heart was racing and I was on the verge of tears but I decided to keep my cool and do something cute to tell Todd. At the time I was doing a "14 days of Valentine's" for Todd and I had some sparkling cider, a cute little kid book called "You're my little luv bug" and a brand spanking new dslr camera to film it all with. (Although the video got deleted somehow...so sad!) I got the camera going and told Todd to come sit on the couch. I had him read the cute book, which is really a darling little book that I bought for him and not for the baby. haha Funny how it worked out though. So he read the book on video and I handed him the bubbly and told him "We are celebrating!" He was really confused so I handed him the pee stick and it took him a minute to register what the thing even was but once he realized what is was he said, "Are we pregnant?!" and I squealed "YES!" We hugged and kissed and I turned off the camera and then I asked him if he was okay because he seemed a little shy and maybe a little nervous and he said "This is good...we need to have a baby." and I said "Are you reassuring yourself?" haha Needless to say we were both realizing the magnitude of what was happening. I was a little nervous but mostly just thrilled and so excited to be a mommy.
The next day I called to make an appointment with my doctor for February 16th, 2012 at 8:15am (I wrote it all down, it was my first OB appointment and I didn't want to forget anything about it). I saw him when I was six weeks along and he said I seemed to be doing really well. He was impressed with me for being on prenatal vitamins for so long. I guess women don't typically do that? I got on my prenatal vitamins about 6 months before we started trying. I was not about to take any chances with my babies health! So everything was going great. The next week however when I was at a mutual activity for church I started spotting and cramping. I called my sister and her husband, Bryan, talked to me and told me I might be having a miscarriage or I could be just fine. We talked about an ectopic pregnancy and I had no idea what that was so when I looked it up and basically saw that it is a very bad thing, I freaked a little. Todd and I talked about going to the urgent care that night but I just decided to wait until morning and go then. I figured if my body was already trying to get rid of the failed pregnancy then there was nothing I could do anyway. So after a loooong morning in the urgent care with a bunch of tests and an ultrasound I got the good news that I was still pregnant and the baby had a healthy heartbeat. They said my body might have been giving off the symptoms of a period even though there was no way I could've actually had a period. I was so happy to hear that my baby was fine AND had a healthy heartbeat! I got a copy of my ultrasound and loved looking at it and seeing how tiny my little peanut was then.
Around that time, I started to get the nausea everyday, and it came on whenever it wanted to so I decided not to call it morning sickness because sometimes the morning was fine and the afternoon and evening were horrible. In week 8, I woke up one morning and felt like I was going to be sick so I asked Todd to get me some plain cereal to try and take the nausea away but that just ended up coming back up and I couldn't stop throwing up all morning long. It was the first time I had thrown up and I felt like it wasn't morning sickness at all. Thankfully I had an appointment later that day with my doctor and double thankfully my mom was able to pick me up and take me because I was not in any condition to be operating heavy machinery. We went to my doctor's appointment and the lady I saw told me that it was DEFINITELY morning sickness and I was just pregnant. But I was almost positive I had a stomach bug. She gave me a prescription for Zofran. It is basically a drug that takes away the nausea and boy it is a miracle drug. I took it for a couple of weeks until all of my family went through the same exact thing I did and we all deduced that it was a stomach bug. I got off of the Zofran and had to deal with the stinking nausea again but I decided that I didn't need the drugs and I would handle this tough part of the pregnancy without it.
One day I was having a really hard time and I wanted to just take a Zofran pill and feel great but I felt so dumb for even thinking about it and I realized that I hadn't gone to the Lord once to ask for help with the nausea. So I got down on my knees and prayed for help to get through the day and be able to keep a meal down for the babies sake. When I got up off my knees I immediately felt confident that I would be able to keep my food down so I ate it all and I felt so much better, the nausea went away for a time and I just cried because I was so thankful for a loving Heavenly Father that cared about my small and simple needs. I texted Todd and told him what had happened and he was really happy about it too.
Over the next few weeks I was really sick morning and night. I only threw up a few more times which is pretty dang good if you ask me. I was sick until the middle of April when I entered my second trimester and then one day it was all gone! It was a glorious day. haha
I guess the most recent things that have happened are baby bubbles and flutters last week. I cried when it happened. I knew it was the baby and then it happened again later in the week when we were road tripping to Utah. I could feel the baby squirming around inside me. Also, Todd thinks it's fun to massage my belly and put his face right up to it and say "Hiiiii babyyyyyy. I love yoooooou babyyyyy." haha So cute and it tickles. He wants the baby to know his voice when it enters the world. :) Seriously, most amazing husband ever.
Also, I had a really awesome dream last night that was actually really vivid. I had a dream that I gave birth to a BEAUTIFUL baby boy and that he was a good eater but mostly I remember waking up feeling so much love for this little dream baby. I just got out of bed and cried because I am so thankful for this baby inside me and I can't wait to hold him/her in my arms someday. I really don't think I have wanted anything more in my entire life. Even when I was a little girl, I couldn't wait to have a baby of my own someday. Of course I dreamt of having the perfect husband as well, which I obviously got. ;)
Anyway, longest post of my life! This is mostly for me to have but I don't mind if some friends want to read it as well. I am SO thankful for a loving Heavenly Father who always pays attention to my needs and helps me whenever I ask for it. And also for my amazing, incredible and hilarious husband. I have always been so thankful for him in my life but I should really say that I am lucky to have him in my life. I don't know why he thought I was the perfect girl but I am so glad that I married him. He really is so perfect in every way. He is the kindest man and treats me like a queen. Seriously, he does. haha I'm so in love and SO thankful for him in my life. We are very excited to be having this baby and I am so thankful that I am going through this with my sister, Christy. Which by the way, we have the same due date. 10-11-12! Cool due date, eh? I love it! :)
I have the best family and friends too. Such a great support system and so many girlfriends going through all of this with me! I love having tons of pregnant girlfriends! I feel very blessed and lucky to have had a very healthy pregnancy and that I didn't have a miscarriage with this first pregnancy. I know how common they are the first time so I count my blessings and will never take for granted that I have been able to carry this baby. In my patriarchal blessing I was told I would be "blessed with sons and daughters in my home." I can't even describe how much love I have for Heavenly Father and that he would trust me enough to send his precious angel babies to me.
Anyway, I am going to go swim some laps with my girlfriend Rach. That is pretty much the only cardio I get in anymore. haha I should probably work in some more cardio per week but anyway. Until next time!
